How to Practice Self-Love When You’re Struggling with Body Confidence
When body confidence is low, practising self-love can feel like an uphill battle. But it’s in these moments of doubt that self-love is most crucial. Body confidence isn’t about loving how you look all the time—it’s about treating yourself with kindness, respect, and compassion, no matter how you feel about your body on any given day. In this guide, we’ll explore some practical ways to foster self-love and boost body confidence, even when it feels challenging.
1. Speak to Yourself with Compassion
We often speak to ourselves in ways we would never speak to a friend. The next time you catch yourself engaging in negative self-talk, ask: “Would I say this to someone I love?” Replace harsh criticisms with gentle, affirming language. It might feel strange at first, but the more you practice, the more natural it will become. Building body confidence starts with being kinder to yourself.
2. Shift Your Focus from Appearance to Function
Instead of fixating on how your body looks, try focusing on what it can do. Celebrate its strength, resilience, and ability to carry you through life’s ups and downs. Maybe your legs help you walk, dance, or run; your hands allow you to create and connect. Appreciating your body for its functionality rather than appearance can help shift the narrative to one of gratitude and respect.
“I hate my body, I hate being seen in swimwear on holiday and I avoid exercising in public. I don’t feel comfortable in anything I wear. I have clothes in my wardrobe which I’m hoping to slim into… they’ve been there for 15 years. I usually wear something baggy to cover up my body.”
Does this sound like you?
This coaching workbook is designed to help you move from a place of hating your body, to a place of respecting and accepting your body, while also recognising that you are so much more than your appearance.
After completing the coaching exercises your body image will no longer hold you back from the parts of life you've been missing out on.
This workbook is split into three parts of coaching exercises:
1. Body Neutrality - Shifting your focus away from your physical appearance and onto the other parts of what makes you, you.
2. Body Acceptance – Learning how to show your body respect and compassion and reach a place of peaceful acceptance with it.
3. Body Confidence – Reaching the stage where we don’t let our appearance or, more accurately, the thoughts we have about our appearance, hold us back from enjoying the life we want.
//UPDATED - June 2021 // My bestselling workbook has now been expanded to include more coaching exercises and information to help you heal your body image!
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Your purchase is a digitally fillable pdf, which you can complete using your computer :)
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About the Author & Store Owner:
Karen Lynne Oliver, BA, MA, is the Founder of Beyond The Bathroom Scale®, a hub of self-help resources to aid with recovery from disordered eating and body image. Karen is also the Programme Director of The Health Mindset Programme™, a 6-month online self-help programme for anyone who wants to improve their body image and relationship with food.
Karen has had articles published in on HuffPost UK and has been featured in The Metro and Cosmopolitan Magazine. Her award-winning blog and coaching programme is based on the Health at Every Size ® approach to health and draws on the principals of Intuitive Eating, the Body Positivity movement, Motivational Interviewing (MI), Positive Psychology and Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT), in order to help busy women tackle disordered eating, overcome emotional eating and recover from long-term dieting via a holistic, research-led online coaching programme.
A former Social Worker, Karen comes from an academic background of Psychology and Sociology. She holds a bachelor’s degree in Sociology, specialising in health and society and a master’s degree in Social Work. She has trained in Counselling skills and Psychotherapy-based approaches such as CBT, DBT and Motivational Interviewing.
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3. Surround Yourself with Positive Influences
The media and social platforms can be breeding grounds for body insecurity. Curate your feed by following accounts that promote body positivity, diversity, and authenticity. Surround yourself with people and messages that uplift rather than tear down. By choosing to engage with body-positive content, you reinforce the idea that all bodies, including yours, are worthy of love and respect.
4. Engage in Joyful Movement
Exercise should be about feeling good, not punishing yourself for how you look. Shift your mindset from working out to changing your body to moving it in ways that bring you joy. Whether it’s dancing, yoga, walking, or swimming, choose activities that make you feel strong, energized, and happy. Moving your body in ways you enjoy is a powerful act of self-love.
5. Practice Daily Gratitude
Each day, write down a few things you’re grateful for about your body. It could be something as simple as appreciating how your lungs help you breathe or how your body supports you through stressful times. Practising gratitude regularly can help foster a more positive relationship with your body, even on days when confidence feels low.
6. Set Boundaries Around Body Talk
Sometimes, negative body talk comes from others. If conversations around appearance, weight, or dieting trigger feelings of insecurity, don’t be afraid to set boundaries. Politely steer the conversation in a different direction or let people know you’re not comfortable discussing those topics. Protecting your mental and emotional well-being is an essential part of self-love.
7. Celebrate Small Wins
Body confidence isn’t built overnight, but every small step counts. Celebrate even the smallest moments of self-love—whether that’s wearing something that makes you feel good, taking a day off to rest, or challenging a negative thought. Each time you choose to treat yourself with kindness, you’re building a stronger foundation for lasting body confidence.
Struggling with body confidence is normal, but it doesn’t have to be a lifelong battle. With the right tools and mindset shifts, you can start practising self-love and building a healthier, more positive relationship with your body.
To dive deeper into this journey, explore my Body Image Course. In this course, we’ll discuss the importance of self-compassion and body acceptance and why it’s crucial for your health. You’ll learn how to break free from the damaging effects of body shaming and diet culture so you can finally prioritize your well-being over societal pressures. Let’s take this transformative step together—because you deserve to feel confident and comfortable in your own skin.
Join our Body Image course to explore body acceptance and positive self-view. This video-based course includes CBT worksheets covering topics like body shaming, self-respect, media detox, and the body positivity movement.
